Ugh

Two trips to the ER to find out I'm in perfect health.  Like, freakishly perfect health.  But obviously something is wrong, because I was there.  So I have another doctor's appointment today to see if I need to change my diet or if I have a reptilian in my stomach.

For those of you who did not get that joke, watch "Alien".  :P

Tristan is increasingly irritated with me.  Which makes me irritated with him.  But he doesn't really know why he continuously wants to punch me in the face (he hasn't, it's just the urge he has), so I'm just giving him his space because I'd really rather not deal with his crap right now.  Okay yesterday was legit, I begged him to come with me to the ER since they said it would be way quick and I don't "do" hospitals, and we were there for 6 1/2 hours.  I felt way bad and bought us pizza afterwards.  I want to call his therapist to see what can be done, because this is the fourth day of Tristan's irritation and it's just ridiculous.

I'm irritated too, mainly because he's been out drinking almost every night (almost, last night he stayed home) and  then he doesn't take his meds, he's off schedule, and getting him to take the smallest dosages takes time and lots of negotiation before he even picks it up in his hand.  The other night one of his friends (an old friend of mine who, sad to say, doesn't quite understand that boundaries exist) dropped him off way tipsy and said, "Make sure he doesn't take his meds!  He's had way too much to drink!"

I was nice, I smiled, said "Okay, thanks for letting me know, have a great night!"  And proceeded to mentally scream at her in anger and frustration.  What the hell?  Does she even know what his medication is for???  How about YOU live with him for a month on no meds?  See how long you last?  I did check on him and he hadn't drank nearly as much as his friend indicated and was fine to take his medication.  That is, if he would let me give it to him.

There's a possibility I've developed an ulcer.  Ulcers are caused by stress.  This would be one of those things that stress me out big time.  I've thought over what exactly stresses me, and shockingly enough, Tristan actually doesn't stress me out as much as I expected.  Like, it's very sporadic and minimal compared to the stress I get from work, family and dealing with crap like "don't let him take the medication that quiets the evil voices in his head".

Actually, being around Tristan calms me down like nothing else does (I'd like to say church calms me even more, but lately the political drama of the hypocrites that exudes from something as minor as worship bothers me on a very deep level).  When I went to the ER on Sunday (work sent me, yay), I called Tristan to just let him know where I was if he needed to get ahold of me.  He drove over and sat with me through everything, helping me to calm down in the unfamiliar setting.  Yes, I'm not a frequent hospital goer in any sense.  The last time I was in one for myself, I was 8 months old and knocked out cold from splitting my head open on a coffee table.