Polar Shifts

Tristan felt compelled to write an entry in his own blog about how I'm in some fantasy trying to live my life through his.  How his friends hate me, how I slap "demon" on everything I don't like....

Oh well.

Alex called me today, after reading my blog, and apologized for the rift that was caused between Tristan and I.  Wow.  I was extremely impressed, touched and she definitely gained some deep respect from me.  We had a great talk, smoothed over the misunderstandings and miscommunication (gossip is a horrid thing and all of us are guilty of believing it at one point or another), and made a solid goal to get to know each other, to make an effort to be friends.  And to my surprise and sheer relief, she not only listened to my warning about the "bad things coming" that I feel, she believed me.

I REALLY like her.

Tristan refused to believe I was trying, and he made it so freaking difficult.  He said some things that I won't repeat because, as we all learned, Tristan Keller tends to say things he often forgets, especially when he is angry or frustrated.  So, seeing as we're all going to forget it, there's no point in bringing it up.  Point being, I spent an hour crying and sobbing and asking God (and Mom) if I was such a bad person as Tristan claimed I was.  I wanted to throw him out of the house, I wanted him to go back to whatever spaceship he came down from, I wanted him to forgive me and for everything to be as it was.

By the time we got to work, he was using me as an arm rest and teaching me how to develop film in the photo lab.  He even helped tidy up the shelves in my department but if I thanked him for it, he denied he was doing anything of the sort.  But I know he was, and I thanked him anyways.  When he wasn't around to hear it.

I wanted to let you know that things are going well, and that Alex may indeed be further included in our world of secrets.  For her sake I hope it's only to the surface levels, as the deeper you go the more dangerous you become.  And dangerous people always have someone trying to destroy them, whether they're good or not.  It doesn't matter what moral code you hold to if someone wants to keep you from bringing their stains to light.  I don't want anyone hurt, let alone a friend.

I'm tired, very sleepy and want to talk with Tristan about what we've discovered tonight.  After watching a presentation (a small seminar that was taped and posted on Youtube which I will link sometime soon), he decided to go to bed and said it had made knots in his stomach.  We had paused and discussed theories, paused and tried to decipher symbols in the sand, paused and realized that a long string of symbols may actually be a map of our solar system and a brief account of the migration to Earth.  But it was the talk of war, of how evidence of craters and 90 degree shifts of Mars' poles suggest a cataclysmic explosion that could have very easily destroyed all life....